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Over the next couple of months, I will be working through Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt’s 2013 book Making Marriage Simple. In it, they take the main concepts from their best-selling book Getting the Love You Want, “and add the most important relationship wisdom we’ve discovered since,” putting it all into a simpler format….
I am a coach and as such, have always insisted my players focus on the basics. In football, if my linemen could block and tackle well, we would win games. In hockey, skating, passing, checking, and shooting were the four basic skills that allowed us to succeed. I believe the same is true of relationships….
Last week when we began the discussion about The Imago Therapist, the authors asked four questions. The answers to which would influence how I and other Imago therapists work with couples. I went on to say that we all, at some level, whether consciously or unconsciously have also answered those questions, and that our answers…
Remember this is just The Preface to the book, which continues for another 500 pages. I am going to quote Harville and Helen pretty extensively here because it might better help you understand their train of thought. It’s after the preface that they will explicate their thinking more fully. I believe what they are really…
Many of you know I have been an Imago Relationship therapist for the last 34 years. Two years ago Harville and Helen, the creators of Imago, published a Clinician’s Guide titled Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space-Between. It is a pretty intense volume. What I thought I would do for the next few weeks…
“By acts of service, I mean doing things you know your spouse would like you to do.” (P.87) The caveat is: ”No one likes to be forced to do anything, in fact, love is always freely given. Love cannot be demanded. We can request things from each other, but we must never demand anything. Requests…
In every culture, Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages studied “gift giving was a part of the love-marriage process.” He defines a gift as: “something you can hold in your hand and say, ‘Look, he was thinking of me, or ‘She remembered me’. You must be thinking of someone to give him a gift….
There are tons of self-help books on relationships out there. My wife and I chose five that have proved helpful to us and in the office. If you go to her website, Journey to Inner Wisdom, you can find the links to her podcast and YouTube video of the two of us discussing these five…