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John Sullivan Counselling

Marriage Counselling and Couples Therapy

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Enneagram Seven – The Adventurer

Enneagram Seven is motivated by the need to be happy and plan enjoyable activities. They also feel the need to contribute to the world, and avoid suffering and pain. In a relationship, sevens at their best are light-hearted, generous, outgoing, caring, and fun. They introduce their friends and loved ones to new activities and adventures.

I am married to a very aware seven and can certainly attest to her introducing me to new activities and adventures and just having fun together. (Yesterday, for example, she encouraged me to go to a friend’s for dinner and a hot tub – the last thing I would have done on my own but it was truly enjoyable for both of us – so yes these different energies are real and do express themselves every day. It just helps to be aware of them.)

Crystal the Seven, John the Six

Just as an aside, before we were introduced to the Enneagram years and years ago… and remember, I am a six who tends to operate out of fear. Crystal, being a seven was always on the lookout for the new, the exciting, the adventure. Whereas she might be saying “I can’t begin to count the fun things I want to do”, my six energy had at least one foot, sometimes both feet, on the brakes.

Knowing our types has been very helpful in our relationship. It allowed us to be able to recognize that we tend to see the same situation from totally different perspectives, but not to make one wrong and the other right – they are just different and we can figure out what to do so we are both ok. 

Enneagram Seven Wings

The wings of seven are 6 and 8. Sevens with a more developed six wing tend to be more loyal, endearing, responsible, and anxious. Sevens with a more developed eight wing tend to be more exuberant, aggressive, competitive, and materialistic. 

Enneagram Seven Movement

The movement for sevens is to 5 and 1. The positive move to five helps them become more introspective and objective, get in touch with their fears and become more serious and thus are taken more seriously. The positive move to one helps them follow through and put their ideals into action and become more interested in the welfare of others. 

Again from The Enneagram Made Easy…things sevens would never dream of doing:

  • Finishing all the books they were reading before starting a new one
  • Making to-do lists for the week and following them exactly
  • Telling stories without exaggerating
  • Spending six months at a Zen center in silent meditation
  • Enjoying a whole day with a friend and not suggesting even one way she or he could do a job faster by taking a few shortcuts
  • Volunteering to work on a grief hotline
  • Spending twelve hours listening to a friend unload her problems and talk about herself.

So there you have it. A quick look at a seven on the Enneagram. 

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That's how he likes to think of himself - a coach. John Sullivan won't fix your relationship. He gives you the tools to help you build permanent and lasting connections and a deeper intimacy with those in your life.

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