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The Space Between: A Quantum Perspective As a relationship coach, I start here because I truly believe that the fastest way forward for any couple is to pay close attention to the space between them: it is a real energy field. “In their book Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space-Between, Harville, and Helen examine,…
In the last chapter, the authors gave numerous examples of how the Safe Conversation Process worked in everyday life in a wide array of situations and settings. I added two examples of my own where I was surprised at how well it worked in situations other than with couples in my office. In Chapter 9…
The third piece of the Safe Conversation Process is the commitment to practice zero negativity. The ZN commitment came relatively late into the core Imago theory – maybe in the last 8 or 10 years. Still, I truly believe, it is the fastest way forward for any couple, and by extension for any relationship. The…
Today we explore Chapter 2: The Solution of How to Talk with Anyone about Anything. This is the newest book by Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt. If feeling disconnected is one part of the problem and objection to difference is the other, what is the solution? Seeing, listening, and valuing the other person is…
This week we’ll focus on the positives in the Space-Between but we must transition with last week’s blog. Last week I talked about removing all negativity from the Space-Between. Negativity causes disconnect and what you want is connection. I came across a great quote the other day: “The greatest illusion of the universe is the…
Where does Zero Negativity fall under the basics for a great relationship? The Basics of a Great Relationship Safety Zero Negativity in the Space-Between Refill that space with Positives Couples need to learn to talk to each other safely (in the Imago system we use the Safe Conversation Process). Last week I talked about safety,…
I am a coach and as such, have always insisted my players focus on the basics. In football, if my linemen could block and tackle well, we would win games. In hockey, skating, passing, checking, and shooting were the four basic skills that allowed us to succeed. I believe the same is true of relationships….
In the Preface to Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space-Between, Harville, and Helen share a brief intellectual autobiography explaining how Imago Relationship Therapy came about. They say: “Although we come from opposite ends of the social and economic spectrum, we have similar childhood experiences which contributed, from the beginning to a very complex and…
I encountered a specific relationship challenge recently, the concept of “it’s not fair!” Relationship Challenge “What you are doing is not working.” I used that phrase the other day in the office and was challenged by my client. His understanding was the phrase meant that he was doing something wrong. The way he saw it…
Last week in The Space Between: Part 1, I suggested that the fastest way forward for any couple is to really protect the Space Between. It is sacred ground, holy ground. No negativity in the Space Between. Negativity causes disconnect and from the quantum level up, what you want is connection. I went on to…