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John Sullivan Counselling

Marriage Counselling and Couples Therapy

P: 519-966-1408   C: 226-346-2503
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Holiday Relationship Tip 3

The 12 days of Christmas Relationship Tips

3. The Sacred Space Between

Typically we think of a relationship as two people, you and you, but what’s between you is a sacred space. My challenge to you is to start thinking of your relationship as the two of you, plus the space between you. It is a real energy field, isn’t it? And you can tell when there is tension in that energy field, it is either tense or not tense, and there is no middle ground. 

Quantum physics and quantum theory tells us that our whole universe is mainly energy and that it is all connected, it is all in a relationship – atom to atom, molecule to molecule, planet to planet, galaxy to galaxy. Your relationship is a microcosm of the vast macrocosm. If you put negativity into that space between it causes disconnect whereas in reality what you really want is to connect.

The Sacred Space Between

I believe the fastest way forward for any couple is to pay attention to the space between. It is a holy ground, a sacred space. You can’t keep putting negativity into the space between as the negativity causes a disconnect. And if the space between becomes too negative then people start to avoid it. Why would I go into a toxic space?

I think when people fall in love the space between is pretty positive – it is new, exciting, fun, and romantic. Then it is small things – a criticism, rolling the eyes, walking away, shutting down, and over time the space between becomes more negative, and like I said, if it becomes too negative, then people start to avoid it. 

Relationship tip 3

Zero negativity in the Space Between – it is holy ground, sacred space. Check with your partner at the end of the day – did either of you experience negativity? More on this tomorrow.

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Relationship Issues

What Conscious Partners Know: 24 and 25

This week, we’re exploring What Conscious Partners Know: 24 and 25 They need to acknowledge each other’s “otherness”, accept each other’s differences, affirm each other’s reality, adore each other’s traits, and advocate for each other’s reality and potential. They must differentiate before they can connect, so they accept each other as an “other” and accept […]

What Conscious Partners Know – 22 and 23

Continuing on with What Conscious Partners Know – Chapters 22 and 23 Connecting is sustained by intentionality, so they speak with a positive tone and use only appreciative or neutral words in all transactions, which helps them feel connected most of the time. The sign of a thriving relationship is how quickly partners engage in […]

Appreciations: Harville and Helen

I have said this before but I think it is worth repeating:  I truly believe the fastest way forward for any couple is to protect the Space-Between them. It is a real energy field, and you can tell, can’t you, when there is tension in the Space-Between? It is either tension-free or it is not. […]

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About The Coach

That's how he likes to think of himself - a coach. John Sullivan won't fix your relationship. He gives you the tools to help you build permanent and lasting connections and a deeper intimacy with those in your life.

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  • Marriage Counselling – Windsor
  • Couples Therapy – Windsor
  • Relationship Coaching – Windsor
  • Imago Therapy

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