What Conscious Partners Know (con’t) Numbers 6-8 from Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space-Between They have complimentary defenses that are natural, and they accept that fact about each other, without judgment. They can reconstruct the memory their partner has of them by expressing new behaviours with intensity. They are different from each other and […]
What Conscious Partners Know
Let’s explore what conscious partners know. I would characterize most relationships, certainly ours was before we knew about Imago Relationship Therapy. It is described as unconscious, old brain, and reactive. For example, if my partner came on too strong, my reactive response was to shut down. If I step back and look at that response, […]
Chapter 5: Personalizing Your Relationship Playbook
In this chapter, I will help personalize your relationship playbook. As a coach, whether it was hockey or football, I was privy to many different playbooks, but I always personalized them for our team. Any adaptions we made might be either to take advantage of the talent I had available at different positions or to […]
Chapter 4: The Imago System: The Past Affects the Present
The last piece of the combination lock is the Imago System. Harville and Helen made a huge intuitive leap in our understanding of relationships by making the connection between the unconscious image – the Imago (Imago is the Latin word for image) children form of their primary caretakers from childhood (the person who loves me, […]
Chapter 3 – Skills: The Safe Conversation Process
Coming up to Valentine’s Day – the tools are available in today’s world to have the relationship of your dreams. So far we have seen the importance of safety. Your old reptilian brain has a 500 million-year track record, you are not going to change it. If you don’t feel safe you will protect yourself. […]
Chapter 2: The Zone of Safety; Key to a Successful Relationship
“Safety is the second important piece of your playbook. Why Safety? Because safety is built into your DNA – your survival. … Our knowledge of exactly how the different parts of the brain interact and how they developed is constantly expanding; however, the consensus of opinion among most experts is that our brain stem is […]
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