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John Sullivan Counselling

Marriage Counselling and Couples Therapy

P: 519-966-1408   C: 226-346-2503
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Metatheory as Perspective

So what is the lens, the metatheory, the perspective, through which we, as Imago therapists, look at our couples? The authors go into a fairly lengthy historical analysis of human suffering and its mitigation.  “In all the ages of human speculation on our fate, suffering itself (as a phenomenal experience) has been identified as anxiety, […]

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Introduction

In the introduction to Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space-Between, Harville, and Helen state quite boldly at the outset… “We have a stealthy purpose in writing this book! … We think a fundamental cultural shift is underway in how we look at the world, at our view of others, how we interact with them, […]

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: couples therapy, imago, imago relationship therapyy, imago theory, imago therapy, relationship therapy, the space between

The Preface: Continued

Remember this is just The Preface to the book, which continues for another 500 pages. I am going to quote Harville and Helen pretty extensively here because it might better help you understand their train of thought. It’s after the preface that they will explicate their thinking more fully. I believe what they are really […]

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: books on relationships, imago, imago relationship therapy, psychology, quantum theory, relational reality, the space between

The Preface: Imago Relationship Therapy

In the Preface to Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space-Between, Harville, and Helen share a brief intellectual autobiography explaining how Imago Relationship Therapy came about. They say: “Although we come from opposite ends of the social and economic spectrum, we have similar childhood experiences which contributed, from the beginning to a very complex and […]

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: imago, imago relationship therapy, imago therapy, safe conversations, the space between, zero negativity

Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space Between

Many of you know I have been an Imago Relationship therapist for the last 34 years. Two years ago Harville and Helen, the creators of Imago, published a Clinician’s Guide titled Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space-Between. It is a pretty intense volume. What I thought I would do for the next few weeks […]

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: books on relationships, imago, imago relationship therapyy, imago therapy, quantum theory, relationship, relationship coaching, the space between

The 5 Love Languages: #5 Physical Touch

“We have long known that physical touch is a way of communicating emotional love. Numerous research projects in the area of child development have made that conclusion: babies who are held, hugged, and kissed develop a healthier emotional life than those who are left for long periods of time without physical contact.” (p.103)  Marital Love […]

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: 5 love languages, acts of service, couples, embracing, holding hands, kissing, love, love languages, physical touch, primary love language, quality time, receiving gifts, spouse, touch, words of affirmation

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Relationship Issues

Chap. 6 (con’t) Mechanics of the Power Struggle

The last part of Chapter 6 The Imago; the Search for Original Connecting deals with what happens between partners when they are locked in the power struggle. Our brain has a negativity bias. This makes sense if you think of our history as humans. For thousands of years, our primal brain was on the lookout […]

Chap. 6 (con’t): 3 Stages of Relationships

In intimate relationships, we call the 3 stages: Romantic love, The Power Struggle, and Adaptation/Resolution. The first 2 are covered in the rest of this chapter and the adaptation/resolution stage will be examined in Chapter 7. Here is something I never knew before.  “All relationships, like life, go through stages. Intimate relationships and other significant […]

Chapter 6 con’t: An Imago Match

Let’s continue our discussion with the Imago Match, from last’s week’s blog. Here is an interesting question for you. “What leads us to choose that one person (or maybe two or three or four) to spend our lives with out of the countless others we could have chosen?” (p.129) Not a bad question really! Why […]

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About The Coach

That's how he likes to think of himself - a coach. John Sullivan won't fix your relationship. He gives you the tools to help you build permanent and lasting connections and a deeper intimacy with those in your life.

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