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John Sullivan Counselling

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Chapter 5: The Human Problem: Ruptured Connecting

In a quantum perspective, relating is our nature. We are part of the cosmic connection of the universe and when we’ve ruptured connecting, the human problem ensues. The authors state:  “We posit that for ALL (emphasis added) human beings, a threatening event occurs in the child-caretaker Space-Between. An intrusive or neglectful caretaker, or both, ruptures […]

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: anxiety, depression, human connecting, imago, imago relationship therapy, imago therapy

Chapter 4: Restoring Connection

Chapter 3 challenged us to examine our human brain. To examine its complexity, its neuroplasticity, and its relational features suggested by quantum theory. The brain only develops in relationship. And as humans, obviously, the earliest relationships are with our caretakers. Chapter 4: Restoring Connection Restoring connection is crucial. Chapter 4 goes on to explore just […]

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: children, mental health, psychological, quantum theory, restoring connection, safety, the space between

Imago Clinical Theory: The Connecting Brain (con’t)

Last week I looked at the lower and midbrain. Today let’s take a look at the connecting brain. Our new brain – the upper brain – which developed much later in our evolutionary trajectory. “Taking up five times more room as does the primal brain, the cerebral cortex is the precious crown jewel of the […]

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Imago Clinical Theory

The six chapters in this section of the book, Imago Clinical Theory, look at life, therapy, and relationships in this new quantum universe of ours. Chapter 3: Our Connecting Brain Chapter 3 begins with a look at our complex human brain and its role in “the drama of couplehood”. The authors don’t pretend to provide […]

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: imago, imago clinical theory, imago relationship therapy, imago theory, imago therapy, lower brain, new brain, old brain

The Space Between: Quantum Field Theory

Let me say at the outset, that I won’t do justice to the complexities explored in this chapter on quantum physics and quantum field theory.  It is above my pay grade. Although, I do know that more and more, as a coach, I urge couples to pay closer attention to The Space Between.  The authors […]

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: couples, couples coaching, couples counselling, negativity, quantum field theory, quantum physics, quantum theory, the space between

The Nonnegotiable Conditions For Restoring & Sustaining Connecting

So what are the nonnegotiable conditions for restoring and sustaining connecting?  First, “The basic tenet of Imago is: Being present and connecting through relationship is ultimately what transforms both partners, not attempting to change themselves or their partner as separate individuals.”  (p.10) This statement sums up the shift in therapy from the Newtonian worldview to […]

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Relationship Issues

Chap. 6 (con’t) Mechanics of the Power Struggle

The last part of Chapter 6 The Imago; the Search for Original Connecting deals with what happens between partners when they are locked in the power struggle. Our brain has a negativity bias. This makes sense if you think of our history as humans. For thousands of years, our primal brain was on the lookout […]

Chap. 6 (con’t): 3 Stages of Relationships

In intimate relationships, we call the 3 stages: Romantic love, The Power Struggle, and Adaptation/Resolution. The first 2 are covered in the rest of this chapter and the adaptation/resolution stage will be examined in Chapter 7. Here is something I never knew before.  “All relationships, like life, go through stages. Intimate relationships and other significant […]

Chapter 6 con’t: An Imago Match

Let’s continue our discussion with the Imago Match, from last’s week’s blog. Here is an interesting question for you. “What leads us to choose that one person (or maybe two or three or four) to spend our lives with out of the countless others we could have chosen?” (p.129) Not a bad question really! Why […]

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About The Coach

That's how he likes to think of himself - a coach. John Sullivan won't fix your relationship. He gives you the tools to help you build permanent and lasting connections and a deeper intimacy with those in your life.

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